On a side note- I never realised how much it could hurt to find out that your own family has been gossipping about you to their friends and other family members. When I found out, it was like a kick to my gullet- and I literally couldn't breathe with the shock and the pain.
I always thought that families look out for each other. But I should have paid more attention to that line from that old Balu Mahendra film which went, "At least vultures only peck at you after you're dead. Relatives will start pecking at you from the first sign of weakness and eventually kill you with their words".
The irony is, my silence and refusal to talk about a rather painful experience to them ended up with them adding two and two, coming to 10 and making up such an amazing story that it literally took my breath away to hear it. Apparently, even my limited Public relations attempt to get my story out there was insufficient, because right now, I'm the family Diva, the demanding bitch who brought shame upon the family by breaking off the engagement.
Their strange compliance at my refusal to talk about my experience beyond the perfunctory statement of facts should have clued me in. They are usually very fond of digging for details.
In hindsight, remaining polite and withdrawn was not a good idea. It would have been better to take out a full page ad in the paper saying "I have heels that are higher than your dick is long" or some equally puerile sentiment, and just sent the clipping to these gossipy sonsofbitches. The resulting burst blood vessel in their brains would have rid the world of some truly purile human beings anyway.
You know what, I suspect the reason behind their purile reaction is this- I have essentially demonstrated, with my bad experience, that entire system of arranged marriage is fundamentally flawed and demeaning to their women. Quite naturally, the traditionalists in my family are upset at being showed up. If they were regular human beings, they may even feel some modicum of shame, at shoving their ridiculous belief system and expectations down my throat, but I doubt it.
Is it any wonder that they now resort to cheap insults and dirty tactics to defend their precious hypocrisy? So while I am frustrated, I make no apologies for taking the stand I have taken to date. I can play victim and cry, but honestly after the past month, I know that's not who I am. Not anymore at least. Neither am I going to censor my impulsive, and occassionally potty mouthed self from mentally composing another lengthy rant while watching XYZ maami get progressively drunk on campari soda at one of the customary family/friends gatherings.
After all- family gossip dies out when the next 'scandal' rears its head. Praying that happens soon though- being painted as a scarlett woman hurt more than I expected it would.
~deviousDiv
I always thought that families look out for each other. But I should have paid more attention to that line from that old Balu Mahendra film which went, "At least vultures only peck at you after you're dead. Relatives will start pecking at you from the first sign of weakness and eventually kill you with their words".
The irony is, my silence and refusal to talk about a rather painful experience to them ended up with them adding two and two, coming to 10 and making up such an amazing story that it literally took my breath away to hear it. Apparently, even my limited Public relations attempt to get my story out there was insufficient, because right now, I'm the family Diva, the demanding bitch who brought shame upon the family by breaking off the engagement.
Their strange compliance at my refusal to talk about my experience beyond the perfunctory statement of facts should have clued me in. They are usually very fond of digging for details.
In hindsight, remaining polite and withdrawn was not a good idea. It would have been better to take out a full page ad in the paper saying "I have heels that are higher than your dick is long" or some equally puerile sentiment, and just sent the clipping to these gossipy sonsofbitches. The resulting burst blood vessel in their brains would have rid the world of some truly purile human beings anyway.
You know what, I suspect the reason behind their purile reaction is this- I have essentially demonstrated, with my bad experience, that entire system of arranged marriage is fundamentally flawed and demeaning to their women. Quite naturally, the traditionalists in my family are upset at being showed up. If they were regular human beings, they may even feel some modicum of shame, at shoving their ridiculous belief system and expectations down my throat, but I doubt it.
Is it any wonder that they now resort to cheap insults and dirty tactics to defend their precious hypocrisy? So while I am frustrated, I make no apologies for taking the stand I have taken to date. I can play victim and cry, but honestly after the past month, I know that's not who I am. Not anymore at least. Neither am I going to censor my impulsive, and occassionally potty mouthed self from mentally composing another lengthy rant while watching XYZ maami get progressively drunk on campari soda at one of the customary family/friends gatherings.
After all- family gossip dies out when the next 'scandal' rears its head. Praying that happens soon though- being painted as a scarlett woman hurt more than I expected it would.
~deviousDiv
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